I am not a big runner however I decided that on my bucket
list I want to run a half marathon. The other
day I ran 3 miles in 32 minutes and I thought that was really good for me being
that I am not a runner. I was really
proud of myself and I wanted to tell my cousin about it. So I told her and she came back at me with oh
yea I am not really a runner but I can run 5 miles and it is nothing to me and
I smoke. Since she came at in a very
competitive manner this put me on the defense. In this situation I can identify some of Gibb’s
defensiveness-producing communication behaviors. There was evaluation vs. description in which
my cousin was very judgmental, control vs. problem orientation in which my
cousin made me feel my opinions are wrong and superiority vs. equality in which
my cousin conveyed she was better than I was.
First of all, that is a great goal for you to set a goal for yourself like running a half marathon. I can hardly run one mile! Also, it sounds like your cousin did indeed use Gibb’s defensiveness-producing communication behaviors. She was being defensive because she probably wanted to show off to you or maybe she didn’t really care. When we use this behavior, we are on the defense for some specific reason and don’t really care to hear the other persons opinion. It is unfortunate that this happened to you, but sometimes, it is just a part of life. Great post!
ReplyDeleteI think it is really great that you want to run a half marathon! I love running but am not very good at it either. My goal was to do a 5K, so you are much more ambitious than I am! But I have definitely been put in similar situations in the past and completely understand how disappointing it can be one someone does not support a goal you have or goes even farther and makes you feel like you are not as good as them. When I get put in situations like this I just try and remember that just because someone says things like that does not make me any less of a person.
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